Common decency

I'm going to have a big griping rant today thanks to this horrible person who decided that because she wanted to look smarter than me and make me feel stupid, when I was trying to help her out, she thus ruined both yesterday and today (because I'm still thinking about it). So mean lady because you decided to be a right old hag. I shall turn your rudeness into entertainment for others.

So it goes like this:
I was at work and it was the busy part of the afternoon when all the patients that were in for surgery that day were being discharged.
Being rushed off my feet and trying to cater to what seemed like hundreds of people all caring for their pets and wanting what's best for them I barely noticed this lady abusing one of our nurses as I rushed by to go discharge another patient.

She happened to be abusing one of the sweetest and most softest spoken nurses I know. Who knows what it was about? Maybe the lady was distressed over a critically ill pet that required expensive emergency surgery - in that case I can kind of understand (although it's not the nurse's fault, or anyone's for that matter that an animal may require an expensive surgery - it's just how it goes. [The government doesn't subsidise veterinary medicine like it does human medicine - this is a HUGE subject that I can go into later]). In situations where someone's beloved family member is critically ill and it depends on their financial situation to decide on the pets fate, people can become very distressed.
Any way back to the story at hand. As I was popping a little kitty cat into a cage so he could go home, the nurse walks out the back looking frazzled. I ask her if she is ok and she slowly nods her head. Unfortunately being abused by people is part of the job description. :/.
So I check the list of which kitties to discharge and chose the next one to do. It was a little kitten that had been speyed (ovariohysterectomy for those who want to know the full term! :D).
The nurse looked over at who I had chosen.
"Good luck" she said, "that was the lady that was abusing me out there".
What on earth was she abusing our nurse for? Her perfectly healthy cat was in for a routine spey.
So I prepared myself for the imminent abuse that I would undoubtedly receive, picked up the kitty's chart and headed out to the battlefield.
When discharging patients we have to go through a list of discharge instructions with the client, to ensure that the animal will be looked after properly, not pull its sutures out or get an infection or be in any pain or discomfort while they heal.

Ok. So here is our conversation. Any thoughts I have are in between asterisks.

Me: Kitty's owner?

Evil hag: Yes, yes that's me.

Me: Ok let's head over to this corner here where it's nice and quiet and I'll go through the discharge instructions with you.

Evil hag: Ok

Me: Ok so kitty has had an anaesthetic today and with anaesthesia-

Evil hag: Yes, yes I know what an anaesthetic is I've had 12 cats.

*I wasn't going to tell her what anaesthesia was, I was telling her how they feel after anaesthesia*

Me: Ok, well because she has had anaesthesia she will feel a little bit groggy and tired tonight, so you need to keep her separate from other pets so she can heal properly for at least the next 2 days.

Evil hag: I'm not keeping them separate from each other, they won't like that.

Me: Well please try.

Evil hag:They are cats, they will do what they want.

*How hard is it to put a cat in a separate room?*
So I continue on with the instructions.
Me: Make sure that when you get home you offer her a small amount of water. If she doesn't vomit or have any nausea, then after half an hour you can offer her a bigger drink. The same goes with food; offer her a small meal when you get home, if there is no vomiting or nausea after an hour then you can offer her a larger meal.

Evil hag: I'll just give her her whole meal when she gets home.

Me: She may feel quite nauseous due to the after effects of the anaesthesia and be sick if you offer her too much food at once.

Evil hag: (evil glare)
I continue on with my instructions:

Me: Don't be concerned if she does not want to eat tonight.
I then discuss pain management and give her Kitty's pain relief.

Me: Ok so one of the most common complications with recovering from surgery is excessive licking of the wound, so if she starts to lick it too much then she will need a head collar-

Evil hag: Did you put in melting sutures?

Me: (confused look) Melting sutures?

Evil hag: The ones that dissolve
I look at her in a confused state as you very rarely put dissolvable sutures in the skin of an animal unless it is wild (and will kill you if you attempt to take them out later), as dissolvable sutures in the skin are very good at wicking bacteria into the wound.

Me: No they will need to be taken out in 10-14 days.

Evil hag:They'll be out in 3 days then.

Me: No you need to bring her in in 10-14 days.

Evil hag: Why?

Me: Because it takes that long for sufficient scar tissue to develop and be strong enough to not allow the wound to reopen.

Evil hag: No, I meant they will take them out themselves in 3 days.

Me: Yes, so that is why she will require a head collar, to PREVENT her from taking her own stitches out.

Evil hag: That won't stop the other cats from taking them out.

Me: Yes that is why you need to keep them SEPARATE from each other.

Evil hag: (evil glare)

Me: Ok so don't let her run around, jump or frolick for the next 5 days as we don't want her to tear her sutures out.

Evil hag: She's a cat, you can't stop her from running around or jumping.

Me: That is why you need to keep her confined in a SEPARATE room.

Evil hag: You people are weird, you obviously don't know what cats do. You can't confine them, they are cats. You don't know anything about cats.

Me (getting fed up at this point): We deal with cats every day.

*I know what I'm talking about, I have a degree in veterinary medicine, I kinda studied about cats and other animals for 5 YEARS OF MY LIFE and have NOW WORKED WITH THEM FOR FREAKING 40 HOURS A WEEK,48 WEEKS A YEAR. Plus I have also owned/ lived with 12 cats. Because apparently owning 12 cats gives you a degree in veterinary medicine these days. Not slaving away for 36 hours a week in lectures and practicals and over 30 hours a week of studying for the first 4 years and then 60-80 hours of clinical rotations, night shift, no lunch and study on top of that in the final year and passing exams in a  5 year degree that requires a minimum of a A- grade to enter. No, no, you just have to have had 12 cats apparently*
*Also the other clients don't seem to have a problem with these instructions*
So at this point I just gave her the medication and went out the back to fetch Kitty.
I picked her up- she was such a sweet little kitty and said to her:
"Oh Kitty I guess we'll be seeing you back in a few days with an infection. I'm sorry you have such an owner"
I popped her in the cage, walked out briskly into the reception handed the hag her poor cat and left, hoping like crap this kitty doesn't get an infection due to her owner's arrogance, for her sake, but also for ours.

Poor kitty. That woman did not have the most attractive butt, nor does she deserve for it to be represented nicely.

The thing that really gets me, is I was providing a service for her, I was helping her out, trying to prevent any pain or suffering for the cat and trying to prevent her from having to spend more money in the future if her cat got an infection. Yet she had to be rude to me, and try and make me sound stupid (in a field that I have studied and work in daily). The stink thing is I have to bite my tongue, I can't tell her what I am actually thinking. I can't tell her that actually she is a stupid cow and by the sounds of things I am way more intelligent than she will ever be (as she has to try and make other people look dumb so that she can feel better about herself).
The thing about these people, is anyone listening in on the conversation can tell what kind of cow this woman is, they don't agree with her, even if she thinks she is so smart.
It's also funny too, because after I had dealt with her I went and talked about her with everyone else and they all started telling me stories of how rude and bitchy she is. So the whole clinic knows she is a cow. What on earth has she gained from acting like that? More people hate her?? Yay??

On a side note: When people get all grumpy and you have done EVERYTHING to help them and been as polite as possible and they are grumpy because you under-quoted them by 2 dollars or their pet wasn't seen sooner because an animal in a critical state came rushing through the doors, or you told them you can't see their vicious dog without a muzzle on and they say something like "I'm NEVER coming to this clinic again!!!" it's hilarious.
Am I supposed to be mortally offended and upset that you don't want to come here again? What was the point of saying that? If you are in such a state of mind that you feel you must say that, then we are pretty damn happy that you are never coming back again, we don't want you. We don't want our staff being abused again. So you telling us you are never coming back again, doesn't upset us in the slightest. We are actually freaking exhilarated that you are never coming back again.

Also we are able to fire clients. So any people who are rude to us, we can refuse to see them, unless their animal is in an immense amount of pain and needs immediate attention.
So just because you pay money for a service it does not make you immune to people not giving you that service in future.


You can tell this lady really made me angry.
See, there was no reason for her rudeness, and look how it's affected me and others.

Rant over.

Ps. Do I have to credit where I got the "seriously guy" from, or is he just that well known? I think it was from Knowyourmeme.com.

Minecraft crochet pig!

My friend Walksthatdonotexist over at her blog Escapades made this cool little crochet pig.

He's a real cutey!

More after the jump:
Minecraft crochet pig

Hypo and Hyper

A lot of people seem to have a problem with the prefixes "hypo" and "hyper".
They are often confused with one another. And what I always find slightly amusing is when someone describes someone else as being "hypo" when they mean they are all excited or over-active. In this circumstance they are using hypo to describe someone who is being hyperactive. This is the most common misuse of the two prefixes.

Hypo is a prefix used to denounce something that is low or decreased. Examples being hypothermia (low temperature), or hypothyroidism (low thyroid hormones).

Hyper is a prefix used to describe something as high or increased such as hyperactive (very active),  hyperthyroidism (overactive thyroid gland creating lots of thyroid hormones), hyperreflexia (exaggerated reflexes) etc etc

So I always have a little chuckle to myself when someone brings in their little Jack Russell terrier and tells me. "Oh Bobby is being soooo hypo today" and I look at him and he's bouncing off the walls.

Me: "Has he been really sick and tired today?"
Client "No! He's been really hypo. I just told you that!"
>.<

I usually just smile sweetly and ask them if they meant he was being hyperactive and they look at me thinking "How does she not know what hypo means?". So they probably think I'm stupid, but then I know the correct use of the prefixes hypo and hyper and am not misusing them. If they do give me that funny look then I will just go ahead and tell them what hypo means.

When not dealing with clients I just generally correct people anyway. But with clients you have to bite your tongue a lot, because if you make them feel uncomfortable then they don't trust you entirely and may not follow instructions properly when it comes to medicating their pet, which is more important than regaining what little dignity you may have left.

The reason that i can't just assume they mean "hyper" when they say "hypo" is because we do get a lot of people in who also know how to use the terms properly. This is especially relevant when human doctors or nurses bring their pets in.
 It is also very important to establish whether or not the animal is hypo or hyper as they can both end up meaning completely different diagnoses!

So even though it is colloquial to describe someone as "hypo" when you mean they are actually hyper, I just can't bring myself to use it in that way, even if a friend is saying it. If I try doing it, my medical brain beats on my colloquial brain and smooshes it into a corner with a baseball bat.

And meanwhile, as the inner turmoil goes on, the word is trying to bubble to the surface and it feels like a bad lunch is about to get vomited/burped up. I swallow halfway through and what comes out is a bastardised word: "hypoer". It's like I physically can't say the prefix in the wrong context and medical brain is triumphant.

For those who are worried: Colloquial brain is ok, he was just in hospital for a while.

My signature

Do you like my fancy little signature? I think it's pretty cool

If you look really hard you can see all the letters of my name in there.
TEZLATAZ.
I feel pretty proud of myself.

Dinosaurs as pets

I've always wondered what it would be like to have a dinosaur as a pet. I've always wanted one (or to be one), but one thing is standing in my way. And that thing, ladies and gentlemen, is EXTINCTION and that maybe my flat isn't big enough.
Well I suppose I do actually have pet dinosaurs; my budgies. Birds can be considered dinosaurs. But that's not a real I HAVE LOTS OF TEETH AND A TAIL dinosaur.

Compsognathus

To be perfectly honest there aren't really a lot of apartment sized dinosaurs out there to our knowledge.
I suppose if you were going for your apartment dinosaurs, your best bets would be the Compsognathus longipes, or Compy as I like to call it. At only a maximum of a metre long he would be your perfect pet. Nice and tiny unlikely to kill you.You could feed him on a diet of freshly caught lizards and bugs (not small children or people as the Jurassic park movies suggest however you could always set him on your annoying little brother if you felt that way inclined).

Another perfect apartment dinosaur would be the Archaeopteryx.
At only 60cm long it fits comfortably in a small aviary. There are many different species and colours to choose from. And judging by it's teeth it probably also ate small vertebrates and insects.

Archaeopteryx

So I compiled a list of other great apartment dinosaurs!!!:
Eoraptor
Fabrosaurus/ Lesothosaurus - a nice little herbivore

Mononykus

Velociraptor - contrary to popular belief as caused by the Jurassic park movies. Velociraptors are actually only 1m long and stand at knee height. The Jurassic park series covers this error up by going on to explain that there were errors in the DNA that caused them to grow too big or something like that. You find that out if you play the game and read the journal. The ones in the movie are based on Deinonychus.
Sinosauropteryx
Sinornithosaurus - you would have to get this one defanged as it has two venomous teeth in the middle of it's mouth.
Mononykus
Caudipteryx
Leaellynasaura
Psittacosaurus
Byronosaurus









So once you have brought your new addition home, you will need to house train him. Never having experienced dinosaur poo before I would assume that it would be similar to chicken poo. Which is not nice at the best of times.

Velociraptor

Some dinosaurs will have more issues toilet training than others. I recommend getting plenty of puppy training pads right from the get go. Because explaining to your landlord why you are cleaning up dinosaur poop from his freshly cleaned brand new all wool fibre luxury carpet is not a fun way to spend a Saturday morning, or any morning for that matter, or any afternoon... or any time at all!

Now we must think of what to feed them - granted you should probably do this before you do think about the toilet training, but if you have a homicidal landlord breathing down your neck, sometimes it's ok to think about the carpets first.
It will be easy to feed them, because if dinosaurs have gone mainstream, which they would have as soon as they became available as pets (due to the novelty factor and nagging children) then there is bound to be a company making dino chow.
Dino Chow made for both your carnivorous and herbivorous friend.
Make sure it is AAFCO approved.

After food and toileting is settled, then the other aspects such as where your new friend will sleep, what collar or harness they may require for walks, toys, vet trips and other necessary things can be attended to.

Then soon little boutique dinosaur clotheshops will pop up that sell booties, hats, jackets and blingy collars. And we will see the rise of the handbag dinosaur. The over-spoiled, babied dinosaur that is every vet's nightmare.

Man I'd love to be a dinosaur vet.


Information gathered from, Collins Dinosaurs; The ultimate guide to prehistoric life,Wikipedia and my head

Radar

I started fostering little abandoned kitties at the start of the year.
My very first was Radar. He turned up on our clinic doorstep in an ice cream container about 5 days old, mewing his little head off.
He was also coincidentally found in a garage.
So I took the little ball of fuzz (I had been so good, I had resisted taking home kitties for a year!) and took him home and commenced 4 hourly feeding through the night.
That very first morning I had to do the dreaded walk over to where he was sleeping to see if he had survived the night (all his other littermates had not survived).
I peeled away the blankets to see a little wriggling fuzzball. He was alive!!!!

So a week after waking up during the night to feed him he began to open his eyes.

They kinda look creepy when they are half open like that. But don't worry, I assure you he gets much cuter.

Here he is at 3 weeks of age:

Radar was still pretty convinced that milk came from my hand. "What!! Milk comes from a nipple!!!!? Don't be preposterous!!!, Get out of here you scoundrel!!!" I totally imagined some fat 1800's fancy lord saying that.

We shall call him "the Duke".

Anyway here is Radar macking out on my hand

NOM

Mmmm, sooo goood. Non existent milk is the best.

Four weeks old

Now you will see why I called him Radar.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.

 HIS GINORMOUS EARS

And here he is after a dry off. :3

Ok so I can't really think of how best to caption/narrate the following pictures so... blaaahh...

He's 7 weeks old here

 10 weeks old:

 BEST. PICTURE. EVER

 I brought home little Lola who was found hypothermic in a ditch, which (by the time she had recovered) was Radar's new play toy. Poor Lola

 

 

 

Now both Radar and Lola have gone to loving forever homes and I just have Fizz, helping me write blogs by licking the inside of my ear. Heeebie jeebies

Hello everybody!!! (crickets chirping) Yes I know that very few people will ever read this particular post, but I don't care. I figured out how to post it, which is the main thing. And thus I am happy.
So; a little about me.
I am a vet! :D Yay I help animals :)

I did only say "a LITTLE about me"
So to satiate your need for cuteness and to introduce you to one of my saved babies.
Here is Fizz:

Fizz was found in somebody's garage and handed in to the clinic. He is about 3-4 weeks old and every time I see him try to attempt running, his huge amount of cuteness makes my brain explode.
He hasn't really figured out that he needs to put at least 40% of his body weight on his back legs. But his little retarded movements, are pretty good brain C4.

So ok. Now that you have had your kitty fix. I'm still trying to work this blog thing out. So if things don't make sense and look like a monkey was the interior designer, that would be why.
So thanks, to whoever's (sp?) reading this (probably just my mum,{hey mum :D}), you now have a kitty picture.